No, it's not a riddle.  There's a slim chance that I may have eye cancer or retinal detachment issues at some unkown time in the future.  This week I went to the optomatrist to get my glasses "renewed" and they discovered I now have a choroidal nevus in both eyes rather than just one.  And of course they've no idea if it is only affecting the outer eye layer of if it runs deeper, then there's the question of location, malignancy etc.  In January I will go get an extensive exam to identify truly what they saw on the first exam.  I know I shouldn't worry "until there's something to worry about", but ...what will I do if I lose my sight?  It's kind of hard not to ask myself that.  I'm trying to look at it positively and tell myself, well make the most of what time you have in that case.  "you don't want to regret wasting the time you had by not painting", etc.  My husband says that I'll do what I do now in reference to the painting question.  I'm not sure how that is even possible.  So much of what I paint is a reaction to what I see developing on the canvas/paper in front of me.  What would I do?  I don't know.  I've time to explore it I suppose.  I'm still scared and at the same time attempting to at least get in the studio once a day until I really know.  And that's good to do in any case.  I really think that I'm just going to spend some time reflecting on what life would be like, how I would adjust, what are the benefits and the consequences?  What really matters?  Looks like it's time to start meditating more.